First thread:
I'm curious to know how many tollyologists play or have played football and where, at what level, which position, etc. I don't mean this to be a pissing contest (I would lose) but I find it really interesting and hopefully share some experiences, "career highlights", etc. (we already know Dules is Corporal Jenks and Biggus is Wenger)

I'll start: I didn't play football until I was 18/19 and starting uni. I played a lot of sports when younger - AFL, tennis, basketball amongst others - and I'm pretty athletic when fit, but I was absolutely shite at football. I know this is hard to believe, but my first touch was almost, ALMOST as bad as Gervinho's yesterday.
For some reason I stuck at it, got played in the thirds at my uni club as a defender, my speed and strength made me semi-useful, but I've picked up a bit of technique and an understanding of the game over the years.
Last time I played club football I played LB (left footed y'see), but the last few years have played 7s as a forward.
I'll return to my old club in the new year and in the meantime will play in a sevens summer league and futsal to get sharp.
Anyway I've won a few league titles, one of which came down to a postponed last game of the season, had to win it to win the league against the 3rd placed team who were very strong offensively. Was an amazing game, we held on to a clean sheet, I remember making a Sagna-versus-villa-esque goal line block at one stage and completely shutting out this big striker who'd dropped down into their team from their seniors. Such a good feeling when you know you've stepped up a level played and out of your skin, especially when it's to win the league.

To sum up, I fucking love playing football. I watch Arsenal play no matter what time it is, where I am, as long as it's physically possible, but I wouldn't hesitate to miss a game if I could play instead. I'm not a great player by any means and will never play at a high level but I'll play until it hurts too much (already broken a wrist and an ankle at it). I've lived in a lot of countries in the last 5-6 years but the one constant is that I've found a place to play football everywhere I've been.

Really interested to get an idea of other Tollyites' footballing escapades.

PS. I don't THINK this thread already exists, I've been lurking for a long time and never saw it anyway and searching "playing football" isn't gonna help me find out. But let me know if I'm wrong.

I was captain of my high school's football team.

Worst memory- Final of some interschool competition, it's 0-0 and we're in the 118th minute and everyone is preparing for penalties. Opponent sends in a low cross into the box and I'm thinking if I clear this now I will be a hero and as I'm having this thought the ball bounces off my leg and into the goal, we lose 1-0. My coach couldn't even look at me and neither could my team mates because I was giving it large all week about how easy this game was going to be and how I would score the winner. There was a lot of dissent in the camp after with people questioning my leadership

I play in midfield, I can't tackle or do much in the way of long passes across field but I run all day and score goals, been sent off more than a few times. I don't encourage my team on the pitch with words and I'm the first to berate someone when they make a silly mistake so not sure why I was made captain.

Yeah I feel your pain, own goals are an awful feeling. I played for my uni at the national uni championships after coming 3rd in our state, and it was all a bit of a laugh. We played early one day after a heavy night on the piss,I swear I could smell the tequila in my sweat. A corner came in and I was so slow all I could do was watch the ball come over the waiting players to me at the backpost, hit me on the shin and into the goal. Even though it we didn't have any pretensions to winning the thing (some teams had curfews in that tournament, we were reckless) I was devastated to put us out. On the other hand I've had some of my best games hungover - your conscious brain is too slow, so cut out the middle man and fly by the seat of your pants - but still drunk not so great.

Even post 30? 🙂

Not as quick as I was but yep. Always the fastest on the pitch

I have one game a year where i look like Iniesta and spend the rest of the time apologising to my team mates.

Olly Girude wrote:

I'm freakishly quick for a white guy

I reckon I could take you over 100m, but my innate respect for the elderly would stop me from gloating too much.

Two left feet, slow as fuck and can't kick a ball to save my life. I enjoy PES and football manager though.

Have always been a goalkeeper although have had this year off due to a back injury from last season. Will be back playing in the new year.

I have played socially rather a lot, but I find the quality of my football varies in inverse proportion to the number of internet forum posts I make.

Mello wrote:

I have one game a year where i look like Iniesta and spend the rest of the time apologising to my team mates.

that's mainly because Iniesta is an ugly fuck

The missus never forgave me.

Used to play Sunday league footy in the marshes some years ago, played as a fullback, we won quite a few of the leagues we played in....fun times. Recently been playing more 6 aside football at Goals but we've not played for some time now cos we cant get enough people together, am really missing playing.

I wasnt the most energetic or fast but could usually read the game well enough to be effective, not bragging but I was technically adept and was pretty good on my weaker left foot. Also I was the backup goal keeper which made things interesting.

I leant someone some football shorts once. They died and I never got them back.

I love playing it, usually play 3 or 4 times a week. 11 a side, 6/7 a side, 5 a side and then the odd weekend i'll play 2 and in with 2 of my friends which is actually really good fun too. I was late to 11 a side and i find it frustrating as fuck. I'm a good footballer and a clever player but yet when i play 11 a side i struggle to do the basics at times. You could take the 5 best players off the opposition and i'd probably run rings around them in a 5 a side game but i just can't do it in a proper game.

We had our league game last night and i played in defence for the first time ever at left back. I'm 5 foot 9, quite timid in challenges and have no defensive nous whatsoever (oh and i'm right footed too) but it actually wasn't that bad.

Playing 5aside and 11aside is completely different as you deal with completley different variables. Ive seen players that look like Messi on a 5aside stage look like Glen Helder in 11aside.

I played Fussball for a number of years in Germany. Midfielder. Nowadays I just play with friends when the weather isn't completely shit. I've got a good touch, very good vision/passing and take a mean freekick. Can't pull of any trickery what so ever so I try to stick to the basics. Love playing in goals though. Pulling off a fingertips save from a shot you know was creeping in feels great. Sucks being of average height. Even if you have the reflexes, chances are you'll never make a living out of it.