So for some reason we've all got these completely random, and mostly useless footballers kicking about at the back of our minds. Think of this thread as a dumping ground for the failed prodigies, the washed up wannabes, and the overall completely random footballers who despite their mediocrity and general forgettableness, have stuck with you for the past 2 decades

I'll start with

Julius Aghahowa

Failed prodigy/mediocre winger. Had a stint at Wigan where he didn't score for almost 2 years. Best known for backflips and being the only player with 99 pace on the old Pro Evos. Currently 30 years old and kicking about with Shakhtar Donetsk

Julius Aghahowa

4 years later

Unlike you (boy have you made yourself clear, btw), i have many good memories of Hleb.

Bold Tone wrote:

Unlike you (boy have you made yourself clear, btw), i have many good memories of Hleb.

How does that clip not include his goal vs River Plate in the CL? Actually it's a good thing they didn't include it as that shitty song would've ruined it, here's the original recording. When the commentator starts losing his shit in unison with the roar of the fans it still gets the hair on the back of my neck up

Proper madman Rene was. Got caught playing coked up in a league match and was incarcerated for a year for being a paid ransom money carrier for Pablo Escobar. He also had major cosmetic surgery done on him because "I'm fed up with being ugly Rene. I want to be sexy Rene." 😆

On a related note, as much of a fan I was of Higuita in my childhood the best goalscoring goalie still is Chilavert imo.

That's a fucking insane free kick to score for anyone, nevermind a goalkeeper.

You will not believe it but i was at Wembley when he did the scorpion kick and missed it as i shifted my gaze thinking the ball in was "shit effort".
As for Chilavert, i remember him well as, through the nineties especially, i watched Italian football on channel 4 and South American football on channel 5 to add to my already deep following of English, Scottish, Welsh, Irish and European football. These were pre-internet days so i bought and read all sorts of football magazines and articles so could have qualified as a football hipster

Bold Tone wrote:

You will not believe it but i was at Wembley when he did the scorpion kick and missed it as i shifted my gaze thinking the ball in was "shit effort".

That's pretty incredible. 😆

Not nearly as obscure as per thread title but somewhat related as it's also a pretty notable football moment in history that I "narrowly" missed out on (my father was in the stadium that day but didn't take me with him as I was too young):

Not a very high standard to be fair but the commentary on this is probably the best I've ever heard in German, "the time for my report is already over but I don't care if they fire me, I'll show you this scene again and again" "Beckenbauer, Baresi etc he'd have danced through all of them" "I don't know about you but my knees are still shaking" 😆

Neil fucking Mellor, I'll never forget that wonder goal he scored against us for Liverpool.

jones wrote:

Not nearly as obscure as per thread title but somewhat related as it's also a pretty notable football moment in history that I "narrowly" missed out on (my father was in the stadium that day but didn't take me with him as I was too young):

Not a very high standard to be fair but the commentary on this is probably the best I've ever heard in German, "the time for my report is already over but I don't care if they fire me, I'll show you this scene again and again" "Beckenbauer, Baresi etc he'd have danced through all of them" "I don't know about you but my knees are still shaking" 😆

Jay Jay Okocha (so good them named him twice) is not obscure!
I saw him score at France 98 for Nigeria.

You want to know something else- He's Alex Iwobi's uncle. 8)

BTW

Jay Jay Okocha (so good them named him twice)

How come they don't say that about Eric Djemba Djemba? 😆

benito carbone, i remember a story about him forfeiting wages to help bradford stay solvent

There can be only one winner of this thread Gaz, a completely forgettable footballer with an unforgeable name.
The one and only-

BONGO CHRIST!

Biggus wrote:
jones wrote:

Not nearly as obscure as per thread title but somewhat related as it's also a pretty notable football moment in history that I "narrowly" missed out on (my father was in the stadium that day but didn't take me with him as I was too young):

Not a very high standard to be fair but the commentary on this is probably the best I've ever heard in German, "the time for my report is already over but I don't care if they fire me, I'll show you this scene again and again" "Beckenbauer, Baresi etc he'd have danced through all of them" "I don't know about you but my knees are still shaking" 😆

Jay Jay Okocha (so good them named him twice) is not obscure!

That's literally my first sentence in the post

Jebus why is everyone so touchy?
I'm just joining the Jay Jay love.....

Not touchy, just correcting you since you quoted me.
Okocha is my home club's first real superstar, one of the first football shirts my parents bought me has his name on it.

If we had a thread of players who never played for Arsenal but you wished they did, he'd be in it.

I suppose Wenger coulda signed him, but y'know.....His club wanted money....

I always wondered why he didn't move to a bigger club after a fantastic WC performance in 94 and only ended up at Fenerbahce after a great performance in the 96 Olympics. I don't have any evidence apart from chit-chat from some Nigerian friend of mine who said he was ill-advised by a greedy agent who over priced him.
Would have achieved so much more at a bigger club as he wasted his prime at Fenerbahce and PSG.

What about our very own not-so-super sub Perry Groves.

I remember George Graham always bringing him on, in desperation, for the last five minutes when we were losing but i don't think he ever saved a match.